Three Ways to Really Get Your Husband's Attention

Getting his attention was once an easy thing to do. In the early days of your marriage, you seemed to have it all the time. There were even times when you secretly wished you could have a little less of it. Lately, however, things have changed and he seems more content to work in the garage, absorb himself in video games, or assume his position as king of the Lazy-boy with remote in hand than to pay attention to you. What went wrong? And, what can you do to get his attention all over again? 

The good news for you, is that all relationships have their ups and downs. It's a normal cycle. The better news, is that it's not beyond your control to take the upper hand and make sure you have his attention now, and any other time when other issues seem to be horning in on your time with your husband. 

1) Feed him. Debi Gutierrez is a very funny comedian who understands the male psyche pretty well. She believes there are only two things you can do to really get his attention and make him happy. Feeding him is one of those things. It doesn't take much imagination to come up with the other. The thing is, it isn't all about whether or not you offer him food. It's about the kind of food you offer him. Men are lusty creatures. It shows in their appetite for you as well as their appetite for food. You can't feed him the things that leave you feeling deprived for dinner and expect him to be happy with the results. Give him real food made for his appetites and see what a difference it makes in the attention he pays you. 

2) Compliment him. Pay him a compliment. Tell him how much the little things he does really mean to you. Let him know that you appreciate the way he takes care of you and your family. Tell him how much he means to you. Women are often credited with being the sentimental ones in relationships. You often forget that men need to hear these words of affirmation and appreciation just as much as you need to hear them. Not only does this set an amazing example for him to follow but it also lets him know how you really feel about the things he does for you and for your marriage. 

3) Make yourself available to him. While we do not live in the day and age of wives submitting to their husbands in the literal sense, there is still something that touches a man above and beyond all else for you to make the first move. For you to be the one offering him what he wants from you. Make the first move. If it doesn't get his attention at first, make your offer a little bolder. Most men do not need to be asked twice though. 

Getting his attention is the easy part. Keeping it, despite all the distractions that impact relationships today is where the road gets a little rockier. Remember these tips whenever his attention starts to stray again and you're sure to keep your marriage on the right path now and down the road.

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Signs Your Husband is Cheating

No woman wants to believer her husband is cheating on her. However, most women really do know when it's happening. Whether you can admit it to yourself or not, it's almost always best to know what's going on so you can make informed decisions about what has to happen next. These are a few of the signs you should be on the lookout for that indicate your husband really may be stepping out on you. 

He Becomes Mr. Critical 

If your normally docile and easy-going husband has recently turned into Mr. Critical, it's often his way of dealing with the guilt or his affair and/or comparing you to the other woman. Many men look for faults in you in order to justify the affair and soothe their consciences over cheating.  

He Begins Spending More Time Away from Home 

If your husband has suddenly started working extra hours, joined a gym without the sweaty results, or taken a sudden interest in a previously unmentioned hobby that keeps him away from home several nights a week, it could be a sign that he's spending that time with someone else. 

He Goes "Off the Grid" Sometimes 

We live in a day and age of constant connectivity. Between mobile phones, computers, and other technological wonders, no one is ever out of touch for long. They especially aren't out of touch with any degree of regularity. If he's going off grid on a regular basis, then it's likely intentional rather than accidental and that can be a sign of real trouble for your relationship. 

His Sexual Preferences Change 

Sometimes this presents itself in a sexual drought at home. Other times it presents as more frequent sex than ever before. It's almost as if he's trying to make up for his indiscretion by behaving even more lovingly at home. However, it almost always results in changing preferences and evolving interests in the bedroom. 

He Brings Up a Specific Other Woman in Conversation Often 

If he's talking about another woman a great deal it's because she's on his mind. That, in and of itself, is cause for concern -- but not necessarily alarm. In many cases, he's thinking about an affair when he's talking about her. When he suddenly stops talking about her is when you should be alarmed. 

Knowing what's going on his mind is half the battle. It is possible to stop an affair before it gets started or becomes too serious if you are aware of the signals and make a concerted effort to stop things before they really heat up.

Four Great ways to Get Your Girl's Attention

Not too long ago, there was a series of commercials, by a mobile phone provider oddly enough, about mobile phone "really?" moments. The premise of the commercial was that this new phone could get you in, out, and back to real life faster than the other phones on the market. The commercial made a great point however. We humans seem to have a hard time getting each other's attention these days. Even in loving relationships, getting your girl's attention can be, difficult. However, these four tips will get you her undivided attention if you go about them the right way. 

1) Get Her Away from the Crowd 

If there is constantly a group of people or an audience around, it's difficult to get through the clutter of other opinions, other advice, and other recommendations. Now is a great time to plan a weekend out of town for the two of you so that you can reconnect with one another without an audience hanging on your every word.

2) Plan an Electronic Free Weekend 

This includes all electronic devices (mobile phones, tablets, laptops, televisions, video game systems, iPods, the whole shebang) if you want it to be effective. The idea is that you'll be forced to rely on each other for communication, companionship, and attention. Play games together, talk to each other, and reconnect in a way you haven't managed in quite a while. You'll be surprised by what a difference going two days without all the distractions can do for your relationship. 

3) Send her Flowers - For No Reason 

You better believe this will get her attention. She's definitely going to want to know what's going on, what's happened, and what you're attempting to apologize for. It will drive her mad with curiosity and have her hanging on your every word until she feels she's gotten to the bottom of things. 

4) Clean the House 

After she picks her jaw up off the floor or wakes up from passing out, she'll be dying to know what's going on, who's coming over, and whether or not you've become a Stepford husband. If house cleaning is something you just can't handle or she does such a great job that it never needs extra help, consider completing some other project she's been asking/nagging you to do for a while now. Just finishing it will be a gift to both of you at this point and will certainly get her attention. 

You don't have to move heaven and earth to make a favorable impression with the girl you love. Little steps can make a big difference in your relationship and ensure that you have her undivided attention now and help you keep it in the future.

 

 

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How Can I Make Her Love Me Again?

Believe it or not, most women don’t leave their men because they’ve stopped loving them. They don’t pull away because you’re not attractive to her anymore. Most of the time, it’s not usually anything you’ve done that’s pushed her away. Believe it or not, there’s an old country song that has it right – for the most part. It’s not what you did. It’s all those things you didn’t do. 

Now, don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying it’s all your fault! 

I’m a firm believer that it takes two to tango. She never spoke up and told you what she needed from you. But, really, how often do you tell her what you need her to do for you? 

While the song may be a few decades old by now, there is wisdom in those old lyrics. If you’re trying to make your relationship work and put a little bit of the love back in it, then you need to remember all the things he forgot. 

Tell Her You Love Her 

Don’t take it for granted that she knows. Tell her. Show her. Shout it out from the rooftops, but make sure she knows, without a doubt, that you only have eyes for her. 

Listen to What She has to Say 

This one is hard. Men and women often live in different worlds when it comes to language. She starts talking and sometimes your eyes just glaze over with this faraway look. She notices this and it hurts. You’re going to have to really listen, like the man in the Klondike commercial. It will impress her and make her feel like she really is important to you. 

Make Time for Her 

But don’t make her feel like it’s a sacrifice. You really should want to do things together once in a great while. Weekly date nights are a small thing, but when done right, they can mean so much for the romance and love in your relationship. It’s one night a week that lets her know she’s still the woman you love.  

Let Her Know She Still Rocks Your World 

Tell her how beautiful she is. No matter how many times she dismisses it, she secretly loves to hear you say it. She wants to know that she still turns you on and that you’re not turning to her because she’s available. She wants to know that your fires are still burning bright for her just as much as you want to know that she still digs you too. 

You don’t have to go to charm school. You don’t have to step outside of your league, get a second job, or lose 100 pounds to get her to love you again. All you really need to do is let her know that you’re still the man she fell for so long ago.

 

 

Why Are You Trying so Hard to Get Your Ex Back?

The one thing most people feel immediately after an unexpected, and unwanted, breakup, is desperation to get your ex back. It's a common denominator that most people experience. You're hurting. The breakup caused the pain. Ergo, getting back together with your ex will end the pain.

Right?

Not so fast!

Before you start pulling out maps and drawing up battle lines, it's a good idea to take a moment to really consider whether getting your ex back is the right move to make in this situation. It may be your kneejerk reaction, but that doesn't mean it's the best action to take. Here are a few questions you should ask yourself before you start making plans.

Why do You Want to Get Your Ex Back?

It's a completely and totally fair question to ask yourself. It's not about love. At least, it shouldn't be. Loving someone alone is not worth moving heaven and earth in order to get your ex back. You might believe you're soul mates, but why do you feel that way? What is it about your ex that makes this the one person you're meant to share your life with and that no other person will do?

Do You Know what You Really Want?

Have you thought about it before now? You may have been making plans for a future together, but could those plans change and create a happier future for you? Is the future you've been planning one that fills you with excitement? Is your ex the one person that fills you with excitement? Or, have you been so busy planning your life as part of a "we" that you've forgotten to make plans for the "me" in the equation? It's not a given that your ex isn't the one and that you aren't meant to be together. But, you owe it to yourself to take enough time to figure out the future you want before you begin to make plans to get your ex back.

Are You Really Good Together?

The final question to ask yourself is the simplest, and often the most difficult. Are you good together? Do you bring out the best or the worst in each other? Is the world better when you're together or did you secretly long for those moments when your ex was busy doing other things?

The questions aren't difficult, but the answers can make or break your plans to get your ex back. If, after answering these hard-hitting questions, you're sure your ex is the one and you want him back, then there's only one thing left to do: "Make it so." I can give you the tools you need to get your ex back. You just have to be willing to put them into action at the right time and place.

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Trying to Get Your Ex Back

It's not easy to be on the outside looking in at what used to be your path to happily ever after. Being unceremoniously dumped without anyone asking your permission, not only hurts, but it also makes your entire world feel as though it's spiraling out of control. Your solution to the problem is simple.

You have decided to get your ex back. You've thrown all your heart, soul, and energy into the coffers and, yet, you're still not seeing a satisfactory return on your investment. If anything, the cold shoulder your ex has been giving you just keeps getting shoulder. What's going wrong in your efforts to win your ex back? Perhaps, it's one of these common, but fixable, hiccups.

You're Trying Too Hard

You want results and you feel that this is worth an all-out effort on your part. Unfortunately, what your ex needs right now is a little bit of emotional distance from the situation. Sometimes absence really is all it takes to make the heart grow fonder. You just have to give the absence the opportunity to happen. Step back. Scale things down completely and let your ex get a taste of what life is really like without you in it.

Making all the Wrong Moves

At least, that's what it feels like is going on. Every move you make feels like it's pushing your ex further and further away. The thing is, it's not the moves you're making that are the problems. It's the fact that you're making them. Stand down. Give your ex a chance to breathe a little. Use this time wisely to come up with a plan of action designed to get your ex's attention in a really positive way when the timing is right.

Moving a Little Too Fast

This is quite common. Your heart is telling you to get in there and "Nip it in the bud!" You don't want to hear any more of this breakup talk. You want to end it all, right now and get on to the infinitely more enjoyable making up talk. There's a reason Barney didn't get a loaded gun and that he was only given ONE bullet. Your heart means well but it doesn't always steer you in the right direction.

If none of these things work to get your ex back, then what will? It takes a well-planned and executed attack to win your ex back after a breakup. You must spend some serious time planning your strategy and paying attention to the little details. More importantly, it takes knowing what to do next. A second chance is just that -- a chance. If you want to make it work, a second time around then you need a little magic on your side. I can help with that!

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Stop Comparing Your Romance to those On the Big Screen

There are many reasons why your romance will never measure up to those on the big screen. If you're constantly comparing your relationship, then you'll never be satisfied and both of you will end up being hurt in the long run. You might be curious about why it's such a bad thing to compare your relationship to those "picture perfect" relationships in Hollywood. Here are a few good reasons why your relationship will never measure up to theirs and why that's a good thing. 

Hollywood Films have Professional Script Writers 

More importantly, these scriptwriters spend hours agonizing over the right words and sequence of events to create a plausible conversation. And they have control of all sides of the conversation. In real world relationships, you only get control of what comes out of your own mouth and that's tenuous at best in the heat of the moment.  

You Don't get to Start the Scene Over When it Doesn't Play Out Right 

The more heated the discussion becomes, the less control you seem to have over the words coming out of your mouth. That doesn't happen in Hollywood. The director just cuts the scene and takes a break when things aren't flowing the right way. You don't get an opportunity to "un-ring" bells in real life. Once it's come out of your mouth, it's there. In all its glory and for the one person who means the most in the world to hear. 

The Actors Put their Characters to Bed, Alone, Each Night 

After a long day of practice, script reading, and careful staging or choreography, the actors leave their characters behind and return to their own lives. That's not a luxury you have when you're comparing your relationship to those on the Silver Screen. You're comparing something real -- your own relationship -- to something that's made believe and temporary at best.  

Actors in the movies don't have to decide who pulls the midnight shift for diaper duty. They don't have to fight over who washes dishes or even who gets control of the remote control for the evening or any of the other petty worries that cause discontentment in modern relationships.  

At the end of the day, everything in Hollywood is the work of an entire team of people working towards one common goal. Hair is always picture perfect; makeup is just right, music, mood lighting, and script in place to produce a little magic on the screen. These things, while enchanting in pictures, fall flat and just shy of satisfying in real life. In the end, you'd grow tired of the façade and run off in search of the real deal or relationship gold. That's why it's better to skip out on the perfect front Hollywood presents and go for something a little heartier in your own relationships instead.

 

 

What's the Big Deal About Date Night?

In the beginning, most couples have no trouble to sticking with a weekly date night. It's a great way to go out and do fun stuff together -- as a couple. It's time to get out of the house and break the routine a bit. However, time marches on. Children come into the picture. Budgets get strained. Economies tumble. The weekly ritual of date night takes a backseat to diaper duty, PTA meetings, and extra shifts at work. Then the marriage starts to crumble bit by bit. Is all this really the result of no longer having date night? It could be. Date night is more important than many couples realize on the surface. But why is it so important? 

Date Night Helps You Stay Connected 

We live in an amazingly connected world. We have laptops, mobile phones, tablet devices, instant messages, Facebook status reports, Twitter feeds and countless other methods to stay connected on-the-go. With all that connectivity, the human connection often gets lost in the mix. People ignore the person sitting across the room in order to connect with someone thousands of miles away they haven't seen in fifteen years. Date night, takes all that away and leaves the two of you alone to connect with one another -- no matter what else is going on in your worlds. 

Allows You to Spend Time Together as Lovers 

Date night is about being alone together. More importantly, it's about going out, away from the house (and the responsibilities that live in that house) and spending time together as lovers. It's a change to hold hands, to have adult conversations, and to, dare I say it, FLIRT with one another. It's time to be man and woman rather than MOM and DAD. It's important because it helps you remember why the two of you fell in love in the first place. 

Forces You to Make Time for Each Other 

One of the most important things you need to do, for the sake of your marriage, is make time for each other. In putting your family first, which is an admirable quality in any family, it's very important to remember that your spouse if your family too. He or she needs your time just as much as each and every one of your children. Date night, gives you one night, out of seven, to spend time together. It shouldn't be too much to ask -- no matter how busy your lives become. 

If you really want to maximize the effectiveness of date night, avoid topics of conversation involving school, work, family, and calendars -- unless you're discussing an upcoming romantic getaway that you're both excited about. Date night is your opportunity to rev up the romance engine in your relationship. Don't take it for granted.

 

 

 

 

Libido Lifting Food for Your Next Date Night

Food for Love? Libido Lifting Food for Your Next Date Night 

Want to try something new and different to turn your traditional date night on its ear? Have you considered a date night filled with foods designed to heighten awareness and boost libido? In any relationship, it can lead to a few truly interesting propositions and, perhaps, more than a few delightful dilemmas.  

Oysters 

You don't have to walk around the block too many times before hearing about the widely held believe that oysters have an almost mystical aphrodisiac affect on those who consume them raw. Science has uncovered a wealth of zinc in oysters which actually boosts testosterone making it a potent force, indeed, for the men who consume them. Consuming oysters raw is necessary for the most powerful benefit though any form is sure to help if your libido is truly lacking these days. 

Avocados 

Because of the potency of this particular dish, Spanish priests once forbade parishioners from eating avocados for fear that it would incite lustful thoughts. The large amounts of vitamin B6 and potassium in avocados does make them an excellent food to include in your next libido bringing date night meal -- as they are famous for raising libidos in men and women alike. 

Chilies  

It's the capsaicin in chilies that leaves people who consume this spicy little number feeling more than a little burst of natural endorphin - stimulated libido action. Whether you consume them without anything else to water them down or chopped and included in prepared meals, the results are quite impressive. 

Chocolate 

Though most commonly associated with women and romantic feelings, the truth of the matter is that the phenylethylamine in chocolate triggers the production of serotonin and endorphins which are both known to take you happy places. 

Date night is an important part of any adult relationship. Eating the right foods during your date night can all but ensure you'll get a happy ending for your evening. Use these foods responsibly and make sure you're both sure to be happy with the outcome. The real key, however, is to present these foods in a manner that isn't exactly obvious.  

·      Create a menu ahead of time.

·      Don't provide any of the foods on the list in isolation - make them part of a bigger picture for the evening.

·      Have fun playing around with the theme.

·      Don't be afraid to try new things for similar results. 

Once you add these dishes to your date night repertoire, you're sure to find new challenges for creative date night meals and locations. Above all else, date night should be a time for the two of you to relax, unwind, and let your hair down together.

Building a Better Foundation for Your Marriage

Marriage requires work. This is something most couples don't understand -- at least when walking into the marriage contract. All relationships require work. Business relationships, parenting relationships, and yet, so many people are surprised to discover just how much work is required to make a marriage successful. Some couples do make it look easy. These are the couples, more often than not, who have built their marriages on solid foundations. If you're interested in keeping your marriage on track, getting it back on track, or trying to get it on track from the very beginning, you need to consider these tips for building a better foundation. 

Discuss Your Past - Briefly 

It's in the past and that's where it needs to remain. Unless you have major secrets you're hiding that could harm your relationship down the road, there isn't much to say about past relationships, connections, and events. That doesn't mean you should attempt to hide things. Only that it isn't necessary to discuss the intimate details of every boy you've kissed from third grade on up. Relationships are often made stronger because of a shared history but the relationships that last are the ones that keep their eyes on the future and are not constantly staring back into the past. 

This also works for fights, arguments, disagreements, etc. Leave them in the past and move on. If you can't forgive and forget, find a way to work it out so that you're not constantly dwelling on it. If it's an ongoing problem find a solution that works for you both or it will continue to be a problem for your marriage. 

Make Plans for the Future - Keep them Flexible 

Flexibility is a word that needs to be a cornerstone for all marriages. It's one thing to have a future mapped out together. You need to have plans for the future. But, you need to avoid sticking to those plans so rigidly that they jeopardize your future together.  

Embrace the Moment - You Never Know How Many You'll Have 

Life is short. And, it offers no guarantees. You never know how many sunrises and sunsets you'll get in your marriage. Illness, accidents, and even relationship turmoil can rob you of the future you hoped for. Cherish the time you have together. When petty arguments arise, really think, long and hard, if the argument is worth the discord. Decide if it's worth robbing you of the joy of being together -- even for a moment. 

Once you build a better foundation for your marriage, based on these principles, you'll see a huge difference in the way you approach problems and work to find solutions. Ultimately, you'll both have a happier marriage that requires less work than many other couples struggling for a future that isn't working for them, rehashing past arguments, or failing to take advantage of the time they have together today.

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How to Get Him Back after Your Heart Broken

Your Heart is Breaking - How do You Get Him Back? 

Your heart is breaking. That's a fairly common denominator after a divorce or breakup. You even want to get him back. You still believe that he's the one. All you need now is to convince him that you're still the one for him.  

Unfortunately, your confidence, in the days and weeks following a breakup, is at an all-time low. It makes it difficult to sell yourself when you don't have complete faith in the product you're peddling. So, what can you do to restore your confidence and win him back?  

Start in the Mirror 

Look at your reflection and let your inner diva loose. I'm not talking about trash talking yourself or putting yourself down. The last thing you want to do is make yourself feel even worse.  

What you need to do by letting your inner diva loose is put a little color in your cheeks, get rid of the bags under your eyes, and stop wearing mascara that's going to leave you looking like Tammy Faye Bakker every time you cry.  

Find ways to bring out the best of your beauty. Then, find new and clever ways to hide your perceived flaws. You know, accentuate the positive. Let that be your focus for the moment. 

Rejoin the World of the Living 

If you're anything like most girls after a breakup, you've been holed up at home with a pint of Haagen-Dazs and a spoon at the ready since the moment you got the news. The only time you're out and about is to replenish your ice cream supply and to work (if you don't have an adequate number of vacation days saved up to cover your time of crisis).  It's time to break out of your shell and get back in the real world. 

Even if you're heart's not in it, you want to look like you're back on the market. Why's that so important? Because it will put him on the defensive. It will leave him wondering why you're able to bounce back so quickly. It will cause him to examine his role in the relationship and where he may have been lacking as well. Most important of all, because it puts YOU on HIS mind - a LOT. And that's the one thing you want most right now. 

But, how you turn all this around and make it work in your favor to win him back? It seems like an awful lot to go through without actually doing anything to win him back, right? Not so much. Believe it or not, you're doing things the right way this way and putting the pressure on him to make the first move.  

Let him see that you're still looking good and going out on the town. He's going to be the one interested in discovering your secret. He's going to be dying to know why you aren't more broken up over this.  

He's GOING to call. Do you have any clue what to say when he does? Let me help you come up with the perfect response to leave him breathlessly waiting for your next call.

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Magical Words to Win Him Back

Zip Zam Zoom – Magical Words to Win Him Back 

Getting your boyfriend back isn’t always a walk in the park. You may have been trying for some time, without success, to make it happen. That’s probably what led you here. You’re looking for a quick and easy, perhaps even magical, solution to get him back for good this time around. 

What is Magic? 

For some people magic is something mystical and wonderful that cannot be understood, much less explained. For other people, magic is simply a trick of the eye or some sort of sleight of hand that always has a solution. 

Whether your definition of magic includes something enchanting and wonderful or a mystery to solve, getting your boyfriend back doesn’t involve supernatural maneuverings. 

BUT 

A few magic words certainly want help. 

Zip 

This is the little pop of fun, pep, and life that is necessary in all lasting relationships. What kind of zip has your relationship had lately? Were things going along swell and suddenly the bottom fell out?  

OR 

Have things been slowly switching from sizzle to fizzle in recent months? When was the last time you went on a romantic date together? How long has it been since you weren’t able to keep your hands off each other? 

But how do you put the “zip” back in after the fact?  

You add the zip into your own life. Spruce up your image a bit. Add a little sparkle to your appearance, add a little boost to your confidence, and become the vibrant, active girl you were when you first met. If the two of you move in remotely similar social circles he will hear about the new you – and it will drive him insane with curiosity. 

Zam 

Get into the best shape of your life. Whether it’s losing weight or adding a little tone, now is the time to get into shape and really take care of yourself. Make sure you’re eating nutritious meals and drinking plenty of water to stay hydrated. These things are important because the one thing you want, more than anything else, if you cross paths with your ex boyfriend is to come across as happy and healthy. 

He expects you to do a little bit of pining and it’s going to really make him curious about what’s going on in your life if you’re going around looking better than ever. 

Zoom 

Keep going and don’t stop to grieve over him. Commit yourself to living your best life without him in it. It’s not moving on. It’s not letting go of the idea of getting him back. It’s even better. It’s showing him that you don’t NEED him – all the while he’s figuring out that he might actually need you.  

Relationships aren’t easy, but neither is breaking up. Give him the chance to see that you’re making it on your own, without him, and he’s very likely to make the first move so you will have no trouble convincing him that the idea to get back together was all his. THAT is the truly magical aspect of getting your boyfriend back – convincing him that he’s the one who wanted to make it happen.

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Lazy Man's Guide to Getting Your Girlfriend Back

The Lazy Man's Guide to Getting Your Girlfriend Back 

Breaking up is especially difficult when it wasn't your plan. Men handle unexpected breakups in different ways. Some men go all in to get their girlfriends back. They jump through crazy hoops, make deals, bargain, beg, and come close to stalking in an effort to get her back. 

Other men decide that maybe this is just how things were meant to be and seek greener pastures elsewhere - at least, that's what they do in time. It often takes at least a little while to mend their broken hearts and feel willing to put them back on the market again. 

But there are still others who want to ride off into the sunset with the girl that got away, but have no idea how to make that happen. More importantly, they want to get her back but they don't want to have to jump through hoops to do it. 

Fortunately, hoop jumping really isn't necessary to get her back. You don't even have to do the chasing. You'll probably be surprised to learn just how easy it can be to get her to come back to you. 

Don't Call Her 

Sounds simple enough, doesn't it? After all, it requires no action on your part. What it does require, though, is dedicated inaction. That's not so simple when every instinct you have is telling you to go after her. 

It's the primal male drive to conquer all threats to life, limb, and overall happiness. You want to make her see the light. You want to show her how good it really is between you. You want things to be the way they were.  

Chasing the girl down might make her swoon in the movies. In real life it nets you a restraining order. Give her a little time to work through her own emotions and take a little time to really think about whether things really were all that good (for both of you) the way they were. 

Make Small Changes at Home 

You don't have to become a completely new man. That's way too much work. But you might make a few small changes in appearance - yes girls really do notice these things. Consider something simple to start with like teeth whitening to brighten your smile.  

While you might not be interested in a full blown gym membership, you might want to consider lifting weights at home (within reason) or playing racquetball or even pickup basketball games for a little firming and toning - maybe even skip that second beer at night or cut back from the pizza. Small changes don't require a lot of effort and can deliver really big results. 

Wait for Her to Come to You 

Believe it or not, the world is small. Once people start noticing the little changes you're making, and believe me they will, word will get back to her. Women are curious creatures. Not only in the sense that men have a hard time understanding them, but because they like to know what's going on. 

It will drive her insane with curiosity that you're doing so well without her. She'll want to know why you're looking better, getting together with other people, and making changes for the better in your life - even little changes get big attention in today's world.  

She will call or "bump" into you just to see what's different. She'll be desperate to know what's going on. That's when it's really time to work your magic. All you need now is the right thing to say to convince her she was wrong to walk away.

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Can You Buy Your Ex Back?

Have you ever resorted to expensive gifts to make up for major misdeeds in the course of your relationship? Many men offer costly gifts to the women they love in hopes of smoothing things over and making it right. It may have started out with flowers and chocolates. Over time, the practice escalated to expensive jewelry, cars, homes, and vacations. The bigger the misdeed, the bigger the buyoff.  

Unfortunately, this practice often does more harm for the relationship than good. The relationship becomes a series of highs and lows with each one attempting to outdo the other. Eventually, you're either out of money or in debt so big that even more problems are being created. All the while, nothing is getting solved. It's just being temporarily swept underneath the discarded ribbons, bows, and tissue paper. 

Here are a few questions to help you get a handle on your gift buying tendencies whenever relationship problems arise. 

How Much Will it Really Cost? 

The costs are not always measured in dollars and cents. Men, especially, will gladly pay the price in dollars to avoid the emotional confrontation required to deal with the real, underlying problem in the relationship. Buying gifts provides a quick, albeit temporary, fix for a problem they don't really want to face. The thing is, the problem is still there the next time mistakes are made and the price tag for avoidance keeps getting bigger and bigger every single time. 

How Much Have You Spent Already? 

The other point to consider is this. How much money have you already spent trying to delay the inevitable? The longer you attempt to put it off, the harder it's going to be to deal with when the time comes. It's kind of like an onion. The core problem is still there. Unfortunately, you're going to have to go in and peel each individual layer, uncovering new problems and hurt feelings along the way, to get to the heart of the matter when the time does arrive to fix the problem or walk away. That money could solve many problems you're having and would have likely been much better spent building your future together rather than covering up the "sins of the past." 

How much can you really afford to spend? This is the final question for many men in your shoes. There's never really enough, is there? Love is something that can't be bought. Forgiveness can't really be purchased either. Women may joke about it, but the truth is they'd rather fix the problems and save the relationship the old-fashioned way than through gifts and bribes. She's MUCH rather receive gifts from you as tokens of love from you instead of buyoffs for her affections.

 

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Want to Get Your Ex Back? Try This!

Movies and romance novels make it look so easy to get your ex back. We all understand that love goes wrong sometimes. But, if you really want to turn the tide for your relationship, you might have to switch up tactics a little bit and try something new and different. Don't let cheesy romantic movies and novels that are fantasy filled ruin your chances. Instead, take a moment to sneak a peek at real advice that gets real results. 

Walk Away - And Don't Look Back 

I'm not saying you shouldn't entertain the idea of getting back together with your ex or that you should even give up hope that you'll be able to accomplish your mission. However, you want to make your ex believe that you've given up -- that you aren't trying to fix things anymore.  

Why?  

Because that's really the only way your ex is going to recognize what it means to be alone. As long as you keep coming around or trying to make things right, your ex has the pleasure of your company and the certainty of your support. Walk away. Go through the motions of moving on with your life and let your ex see what life is like without you in it. More importantly, let your ex wonder who you're spending your time with now. 

Start Investing in Yourself 

During a relationship, people often spend so much time focused on the other person that you ignore the things you want or need. Now is the perfect opportunity to put a little time and attention to fulfilling your own wishes and needs whether they are educational, financial, career-related, or physical in nature. Put yourself first for a change and enjoy a return on investment that involves self-confidence, self-value, and a renewed sense of self-worth. 

What most people don't realize is that this is a critical component of getting an ex back. When you start taking care of yourself and putting yourself first for a change, there are often visible changes the world will notice. Word travels quickly in some circles and your ex, unless he or she has relocated to a rock on Mars, is likely to hear about all the changes going on with you. Your ex is bound to be curious and curiosity usually works in your favor at times like these. 

But, don't take the call, answer the email, or agree to meet your ex until you have a solid strategy in place to make the most of this meeting. Without the right plan in hand, you can undo all your hard work in one single phone call, conversation, or meeting.

 

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Six Secrets for a Long Healthy Relationship

We live in a time when people change relationships more often than they change hairstyles. Some people would call them disposable. Easy come. Easy go. But, what happens, when you think you've found the one. You know, the one they wrote epic poems about long ago. The one that makes every other relationship pale by comparison -- at least as far as your relationship experiences are concerned. How do you hold on to this special relationship while so many other couples are unable to make it work?  

The key word here is work. You have to work at making relationships last. Fortunately for you, these six secrets for relationship success don't always feel like the hard work they are. 

1) Communicate. You have to communicate effectively with each other. That doesn’t simply mean you have to talk to each other. You have to also understand each other and be on the same page about many things in your relationships and in the lives you build together. 

2) Connect. The physical connection between couples is vital to relationship longevity. It goes beyond what takes place in the bedroom however. You really do need the connection of human touch to help solidify your bond. Cuddle together on the couch, hold hands in the theatre, and hug each other as often as possible. The more you touch, in a genuine and affectionate manner, generally speaking, the happier you are together. 

3) Find common ground. Every relationship needs a little common ground. These are the areas where the two of you have shared convictions. Sometimes these convictions are based on morals or religion. Other times they're related to causes or politics. Whatever your shared convictions may be, it's a wise plan to cultivate that common ground and grow together. 

4) Shared interests. This is a little different than common ground. Your interests don't have to be on the same scale. However, if you both love the ocean you might find that buying a sailboat, for instance, is a great way to feed the love of sailing the open seas for one while feeding the love of water and sunshine for the other. You both love the ocean and sailing gives you an opportunity to enjoy the thing you both love together. 

5) Companionship. You must spend time together if your relationship is going to work. Otherwise there really isn't a relationship to cultivate. Time is critical. Finding positive ways to spend your time together, even in troubling times, is a great way to build a stronger relationship together -- especially if you're both committed to the cause of making your relationship last. 

6) Time apart. While it's important to spend time as a couple in order to cultivate and grow the relationship, it's also important to enjoy a little time outside of your partner's company. You both need friends on the side for blowing off steam, wise counsel, and a little break from the intensity of the relationship. 

These six secrets may not look like all that much on a piece of paper, but over the years, they will all make a huge difference in the strength and resilience of your relationship together. Keep them in mind at all times for best results.

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